Givers and Takers

Our thoughts do not occur in a vacuum. They arrive in our mind based on exposure to people or events whether present or past. We are constantly bombarded by triggers. Some we ignore and some we react to. This post on givers and takers is in response to one of those triggers. It is likely we all migrate somewhere on the spectrum of givers and takers.

I was born into a family of givers. My parents were always generous with their money and their willingness to help others. Our home was a haven for someone that needed temporary shelter and a meal was often prepared and offered as a caring sentiment. I learned from their example.

I have also been witness to those who are givers for the sake of appearance, which may qualify them as takers. They are the ones that are all about the photo opportunity or declaring their generosity as a means of self promotion. Often they make empty promises which gives you temporary hope only to drain you in the end. Fortunately, I know more people that land on the giver end of the spectrum, but unfortunately takers lurk around-undermining and even robbing you of something they don’t want you to have or something they want to keep.

To those of us who have witnessed such behavior, the takers of the world, it’s hard to grapple with this tendency. My observation has showed me that those who are “takers” often do not see themselves in that light. They even see themselves as benevolent and generous people. It’s almost like they have a way of twisting the truth in order to justify their action or lack of action. Some even come up with all kinds of schemes that trick themselves into thinking they are givers, because in the end takers ultimately need to be right.  

Then there are the true givers. Givers usually have a kind bent and tend to be content people. Unfortunately their kindness sometimes avails them to being taken advantage of and they find themselves caught in the hairs of confusions and disappointment. Perhaps there is a level of insecurity which outweighs their ability to confront or defend. On the flip side, the true giver often has such a sense of fulfillment that can overcomes any shortcoming they might be experiencing. True givers Continue to give in a spirit of truth despite the disappointments they may endure. 

So takers really don’t win and they really don’t understand what the giver has, which is joy in the experience. The gift to the giver is a sense of appreciation and fulfillment. The giver has freedom to express themselves in kindness to others. This act is often misunderstood or even missed by the taker.