disappointment

We all face disappointment in our lives. Sometimes we can move on, and other times the disappointment has lingering side effects. When we can't move past the hurt, deep resentment and anger set in, often with devastating consequences. Life as we know it can be zapped from our being, often to the point of irreversible harm and detriment. When promises are broken and disappointment sets in, how do we move on?

I know many people whose lives have been riddled with loss and pain. I know it because I witnessed what occurred. Then some suffer in silence because either no one knows, cares, or can do anything about the pain they are in. Perhaps, the main reason disappointment can be so strong is because we think whatever was supposed to happen would make us happier and our lives better. But, in reality, we really don't know if that would be true! I am not referring to health issues or the loss of a loved one. It's the everyday disappointments and maybe a little deeper than that- which I'm writing about today. Maybe, unkept promises are the most painful disappointments and the most difficult to shed?

Often we think more is better. We know that is not always the truth. For example, a typical scenario is a better job, more money=a better life! But, we don't know what "more of something" might have brought? Maybe a better job might cause a breakdown in a family? Or more money, since that is what most of the world is striving for, might bring less dependence on relationships, in both the physical and the spiritual world? We’re often so quick to think if I had… then my life would have turned out better.

 I realize it's not easy to let go of disappointment, but perhaps we all need to question if clinging to the hurt of things that can't be changed, is becoming its own source of disappointment? Do we allow our hurt to morph into who we actual are and walk around as damaged goods? I'm wondering if it is worth giving up some degree of happiness while we hold onto something that can't be changed? Honestly, I really think there's much to learn and gain from the loss. We can't let the hurt take such deep root that we lose focus on what we have and who we can be. Perhaps the only way to get past disappointment is to approach each day with gratitude and acceptance of what was, doesn’t have to be what is.

There comes a point when we have to free ourselves from hurt and disappointment and accept our life as it is. The hardship of winter brings the burst of spring with warmth, vibrant colors and growth. We all know beauty comes from ashes, but we have to believe that is true for our lives as well. What can I do to make my life better? Be grateful for what I have and try to help others have and enjoy a more fulfilled life. There is much beauty in living in the present and much to gain by leaving the hurt in the past. If we don't deliberately move beyond ourselves, we will remain stuck in ourselves and in the cold of winter.